Katy Perry kissed a girl and killed an 89-year-old nun. Not that she or her co-litigants, the Archdiocese of L.A., meant to kill Sister Catherine Rose Holzman, the aged nun, died while fighting them off in a lawsuit they brought against her and the other nuns at the convent.
Giving new meaning to “bad optics,” the demanding star took the nunnery to court because she insisted on buying their property, the Los Feliz convent, even though the nuns wanted restaurant owner Dana Hollister to “save them” by buying it.
So bazillionaire Perry and the zillionaire Archdiocese for whom too much is never enough sued the nuns claiming they had no right to decide who would buy their home because it didn’t belong to them.
Furious to not get what she wanted, Perry claimed Hollister was interfering with her purchase of the property and sadly the court agreed. In fact, a jury in December awarded $ 15 million to Perry and the Archdiocese of L.A. in damages, with Perry getting $ 5 million of it. Hey, do you know how upsetting it must be for a superstar to not get what she wants when she wants it? Her ego was probably permanently damaged.
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But who was supposed to fork over these big bucks? The old nuns who’d devoted their lives to poverty? No, Hollister. The restaurateur was on the hook for the $ 15 million for daring to side with the nuns. This, despite the fact that Hollister’s entire net worth is $ 16 million. Hollister didn’t die from stress, but did file for bankruptcy.
Sister Catherine Rose didn’t file for bankruptcy, but did depart this world. The stress of appearing on the stand during the lawsuit was probably too much for the nearly 90-year-old nun and she keeled over, according to TMZ, after testifying.
“We asked (Hollister) to save us, to buy the property,” she said. “And to Katy Perry, please stop. It’s not doing anyone any good except hurting a lot of people.”
Talk about famous last words. Literally.
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But not to worry. Perry’s used to being excoriated by holy people. Her own evangelical preacher father, Keith Hudson who travels the globe with Katy’s mom, Mary, preaching the word of Jesus also preaches against the word of Katy.
He’s even called their daughter a “devil child” and said, “They ask how can I preach if I produce a girl who sang about kissing another girl? I was at a concert of Katy’s where there were 20,000. I’m watching this generation and they were going at it. It almost looked like church. I stood there and wept and kept on weeping and weeping. They’re loving and worshipping the wrong thing.” As Hudson’s flock might say, Amen Brother, amen.
Tragically now, a lawsuit brought on by what he would call worship of the wrong thing, namely money, has nuns weeping and weeping too.
TOP DON SEXUAL SCANDALS
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There have been so many sleazy White House sex scandals in Trump’s administration in first 14 months that they should cover the chairs in the Oval Office in paper toilet seat covers to prevent STDs. Here’s the top six:
6. Exposed! Turns out that frequent White House/Mar-A-Lago visitor, political operative and sleazebag-turned Russia probe witness, George Nader, had been indicted in the 1980’s for—ugh—child porn.
5. Exposed! Top aide Rob Porter resigned when it was revealed he knocked around his two ex-wives. Current love interest White House Communications Director, Hope Hicks also resigned after scripting a WH Porter defense statement and admitting under oath she told “white lies” in the course of her WH duties.
4. Exposed! Campaign Manager Corey Lewandowski, who had also been in a romantic relationship with Hicks indicted (charges later dropped) for roughing up a reporter, and reportedly smacking singer/Trump supporter Joy Villa, “on the ass.”
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3. Exposed! Trump caught on camera telling Billy Bush to “Grab ‘em by the p—y.” NBC fires Bush, Trump is elected president.
2. Exposed! Buzzfeed publishes the “pee dossier” by former M.I.6. Brit spy Christopher Steele, which claims that while in Russia, Trump had hookers pee on the bed the Obama had slept in. Russians allegedly have hidden camera tape.
1. Exposed! Porny, horny Stormy Daniels scores $ 130K from Trump lawyer to keep quiet about alleged affair with married Trump. Witness to the payoff is porn star Jessica Drake, who also claimed Trump sexually assaulted HER. Stormy sues Trump to negate deal because Trump, (aka David Daniels) didn’t sign it.
THE GOOD, BAD, UGLY ON GUNS
Express Lines: Florida’s governor, Rick Scott signed a sweeping $ 400 million gun control/school safety bill. The sane: It includes a three-day waiting period for most gun purchases and bans the sale or possession of bump stocks. The Insane: While it excludes full-time educators from bringing guns to school, it does allow other employees like coaches, guidance counselors and librarians to pack heat. The NRA immediately filed a federal lawsuit claiming it’s unconstitutional. Clearly the Founding Fathers were all about librarians owning bump stocks. … The World Health Organization has discovered a disease that can wipe out the entire planet. Its name? Disease X. You’d think they could come up with a name that doesn’t sound like a B movie from the 1950s for a disease that can kill us all. … Giants star wide receiver Odell Beckham Jr. was caught on camera in a viral video, relaxing in bed, holding a brown smoke. Next to him is a woman holding a credit card, suspicious white powder in front of her and a pizza box on top of the sheets.
JUST A 7-YEAR PIT STOP
Pharma Bro Martin Shkreli squealed like the pig on Friday when a judge handed him a sentence of seven years in prison for defrauding investors. The sentence will run concurrently with his previous sentence of eternity in hell for jacking up the price of an AIDS drug by 5,000%, to $ 750 a pill.
COSBY ALWAYS CREEPY
Actress Lisa Bonet, who played Denise Huxtable on “The Cosby Show,” says America’s Dad, Bill Cosby, was always a sinister presence. She told Net-a-Porter magazine, “There was no knowledge on my part about his specific actions, but … there was just energy. And that type of sinister, shadow energy cannot be concealed.” She figures however, that karma will get him the justice he deserves. Good, because so far earthly justice has been a giant failure. More than 50 women have accused Cosby of everything from unwanted touching to sexual assault to rape after they’d been drugged. Cosby’s first rape case ended in a mistrial, BUT it will be retried in April. Knock, knock — Karma, are you listening?
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