Say it ain’t so, Joe.
Fox Sports broadcaster Joe Buck recently appeared on the Dan Le Batard Show Monday night and revealed all the juicy details of his trip to Cabo, Mexico in 2011 — including tequila, pot brownies and more — while Buck was recovering from a paralyzed vocal cord due to a hair plug procedure gone wrong.
Buck famously lied about the procedure, originally telling people the reason behind his inability to speak was due to a virus he had developed in the nerves of his left vocal cord, rather than a botched hair replacement procedure. Buck said on the Dan Le Batard Show he believed stress could have played a part in his condition, and as a result, decided to take a vacation to Cabo.
However, like any straight-to-DVD slapstick comedy, the trip went horribly, horribly wrong.
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“I show up thinking that I’m going to do yoga every day. I’m going to read two books. I’m not going to drink. I’m going to do nothing. I’m just going to heal myself because I have this paralyzed vocal cord and my career is over,” Buck said on the show. “And I go down there and within eight minutes I’m on the driving range drunk on tequila. And I can’t escape this tequila virus the entire time.”
However, Buck goes on to say alcohol alone couldn’t help ease his nerves, as Buck remained stressed. Thus, Buck decides to do the only reasonible thing someone does in a situation as such.
He eats a pot brownie — in fact, he eats a pot brownie-and-a-half.
At first, Buck feels no effects, he recalled on the Dan Le Batard Show. But then, while on the way to a bar, it hits him.
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“As I’m riding down there, I’m trying to text somebody and the letters start flying off of my phone into my face,” Buck said on the show. “I’m like, ‘Ah, this is not going to be good.’ We show up, there’s a bachelorette party going on. I’m scared. I’m frightened.”
While Buck didn’t engage in any shenanigans at the bachelorette party (or at least, didn’t admit to), he did have difficulty leaving the bar after asking his driver to take him home.
“He helps me to my feet. We stagger. I somehow magically get down the steps and to the exit,” Buck recalled on the show. “I think we’re going to go right. He thinks we’re going to go left. He pulls me left as I go right.
“I pass out on the ground. I go under the rope with my head hanging off into the marina. I damn near died. I had a dream while I was down there. I popped up and I went from completely out of it to completely sober, worrying that in the next four minutes it was going to pop up on Deadspin that I just went down at a bar in Cabo.”
HEAR IT: Joe Buck once went to the bathroom while broadcasting
Don’t do drugs, kids.
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